24.6.09

Snippets

Traditionally built.

What an odd little phrase. You know what it implies, or is supposed to - the person is on the heftier side of the average body-size spectrum. But it really doesn't make sense.

What does it even mean? Traditional for that family, that community, that country, that region? Does that mean that traditionally, hence historically, the de facto tendency for humans is to be plump? That our hunter-ancestors managed to bring down entire mammoths but could do so without being lean?

And further, does that mean that traditionally, there have never been naturally thin people? That thinness is an unnatural state brought on by too much exercise, a bout of anorexia, or a little hihellokaiseho with liver-related diseases? That the relative underweight nature of almost everybody running on one side of my family is not traditional, but we've instead been cursed/blessed for deed performed in the long-distant past by one of my ancestors?

Tosh. If you want to be PC, use well-rounded. Traditionally built indeed.

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Talking of things that don't make sense - the insane (there's literally no other way to describe it) rush by people in this country to buy tickets for the scheduled MJ concerts.

At last count, all 50 shows were sold out. That's 750,000 people who thought it would be worth paying between £50 and £75 each to go listen to a man who could barely speak at the press conference held to announce all those shows, whose last hyped 'live performance' ended with him whispering faintly while surrounded (ironically) by a children's choir, who last had a semi-decent hit in 1993 (and I still say it was only because of that video with Naomi), and compared to whom I look like Fatty Fatzilla, the Fatman of Fattington.

20 quid says he 'collapses' days before the first concert, and calls off the whole thing because they discover some inoperable illness. Leaving him free to not renege on his contract, but keep all the money and pay off his debts.

How can people be so stupid, again? No wait. I got the answer to that when they re-elected Dubya.

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I want to smack Federer for the outfits he turns up in at Wimbledon each year. He comes across as such a....have to say it....complete and utter prat.

Just play. Don't model for goodness' sake. I'm still getting over Agassi's neon shorts-over-tights outfit.


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Talking of tennis - yay for the BBC. Live coverage of the matches, across multiple channels.

Also, yay for home-working and being able to watch them all.

Don't hate me, I'm a nice person. Really.

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Trying to keep the plants surviving in the current heat wave we're having here (I don't want to jinx it by calling it summer) brought to mind an old thought.

For all the efforts being made to reduce pollution by cutting down emissions and preserving trees and burying carbon blocks underground, I wonder if anybody's thought of genetically modifying plant species so that they use more carbon dioxide for photosynthesis.

More CO2 absorbed = less atmospheric CO2 = lesser global warming = life sustainability for a few more years = yayness.

Yes, I know the composition of the atmosphere is a delicate balance and we can't have too much oxygen otherwise we'd all combust and whatnot, but this could be controlled by growing such plants only in designated farms (in pots maybe) and culling them when things get better.

Anybody know any bio-engineers?

18 comments:

km said...

Should MJ and Sir Paul decide to sing "Say Say Say" on stage, I swear to God I will personally thrash them both with a mic stand.

//Thriller still rocks.

brinda said...

Oi! Read the No 1 Ladies' Detective Agency series. Then we'll talk "traditionally built"...

The Bride said...

I have never heard of traditionally built. I thought "homely" was the euphemism of choice.

??! said...

KM:
I'd happily pay £200 to watch you do that.

Brin:
I knew that's where you took the phrase from! I just finished reading the latest one, and Mma.R kept going on about it.

Bride:
'Homely' is more like for 'wow, she's so not pretty', no?

brinda said...

The No 1 Ladies' is the only place I've seen "traditionally built" used - and I instantly adopted it. And now you go pour such scorn on it :-(

??! said...

Brin:
No scorn. Just bemusement. Actually, in the book it did make sense, because traditionally-built African women are...large. Context, I guess.

Cynic in Wonderland said...

hehehe @brinda - yus thats what came to mind too.

random fact in re: traditionally built. did you know that indians actually have something which is called the thriftiness gene - it works like camels - becoz of so many years of deprivation and famines, indians tend to store weight ( thats the reason lifestyle diseases are so rampant now that famines are over). so traditionally built in our case would proabably be skinny.

( i need to stop storing such vague trivia in my head)

Tabula Rasa said...

ha! i once had an idea about some sort of organism that would consume the oil in oil spills.

blewgenes said...

wow...you were so right about the MJ concert

MJ had Cardiac Arrest 2 hours ago

blewgenes said...

oh well...MJ has gone 1 step ahead of your predictions...he is dead

Vaudevillian said...

you win.

do you accept credit cards?

Tabula Rasa said...

WOW was that premonition on MJ or what??!!

Space Bar said...

I hope you're suitably abashed now. (Of course, you didn't know you were speaking ill of those who were about to die, but).

brinda said...

Wow! That MJ thing is just spooky. Get yourself a crystal ball and go into business

The Bride said...

When I heard the MJ news, I first thought of you. And unfortunately mentioned your remarks to my husband who's an MJ fan and had to listen to him growl at me for 5 minutes.

??! said...

All:
I should learn to stop voicing my premonitions. I've been told about this before.

Look, I'd have happily paid to see his concert 15 years ago, because he was such a brilliant entertainer. But this time round he was so obviously in no condition to even talk for 20 minutes, let alone perform 50 shows, that there really should have been much more concern about his health. Unfortunately, everybody was so bothered about the hype, and so this is where it ends.

It's sad, really.

Of course, somewhere out there is a crackpot who's going to suggest he's not really dead, and they've just got a lookalike, and he's really gone to join Elvis at a little ranch in New Mexico.

km said...

I felt a little bad about my MJ/Paul comment (but decided to let it remain).

"Say say say" sucks and Thriller doesn't.

RIP.

Pri said...

sniff.