22.5.08

More whimsy

I once remarked to a fellow-blogger about how blog-relationships tend to be like intersecting Venn diagrams (this is where I really wish I could make those graphics). Like water, bloggers soon find their own level - of similarities in taste, style, humour - and settle down to mingling amongst them. This process usually doesn't take much time, because people soon reach the limits of how many others they can keep track of, while also (presumably) juggling their own blogging, work, and other aspects of life.

New blogs and bloggers are sporadically and reluctantly paid attention to, and even more reluctantly included in, largely because of all the effort involved. Go read their archives, hope they've read yours, then the having to explain in-jokes (some of you probably wonder about the unkel-ji's and masterji's on this here blog) and having to explain past references suddenly thrown in the middle of a comment-thread. Kaun itni jhanjhat karega.

And the longer you blog, the longer you've been around, the more difficult it gets to care. And the longer you've been blogging, the higher becomes the threshold level of newness or interest that a new blogger must show, for you to continue being interested in them. And lower goes the threshold at which you're willing to forget about them, if they aren't persistent enough with their comments or posts.

This quite directly mirrors real-life relationships and communities. You strike up a basic understanding with people due to the coincidence of constant proximity. Then you extend this to a deeper bond on the discovery of more tangible mutual grounds which you can explore at leisure. And occasionally, you get introduced to people who've formed ties with those you've formed ties with, but in a different context/space/time. And if you click with these new people, good. If not, you've always got your old friends.

The people I now communicate regularly with, were a result of taking a chance on the blog-roll recommendations of the one blogger I knew, and whose blog I first started reading. From that person's blog to the others, from there to others on their blog-rolls, and so on. And while you soon get involved in the common group, you are always aware there are others outside whom you don't mingle with, for whatever reasons.

So KM, TR, OTP, Flaffy, Scouty, Space, Falstaff, Szer, and me form one circle (of regular readers and commenters). But TR and Space also know Veena and Black Mamba. And Szerlem, Aishwarya and me know Roswitha. And Pri, Bikerdude and Puppy are another circle. And Pri, The Bride, and me are in another. And OTP, KM, TR, and Ph are in another.

See? Venn Diagrams.

So, whoever you are, you're welcome to join us. Don't be shy. Comment. That's how we'll have a reason to know you. And if you don't find comments on your own blog, it may just be that we don't find much in common, or may not have anything to say. Which is also my way of apologising if you've commented here, but don't find me reading or following your blogs.

Tea vs coffee vs hot chocolate vs Irish cream. Nothing personal - it's all chance and choice.

24 comments:

Unknown said...

First 2 comment - Not that I expect you to read my blog and comment.... ;)

NightWatchmen said...

Err hmm err okay. We were wondering what or rather if at all we should comment on the previous post but I guess this will have to do.....

Anyway since the point of Venn Diagrams have been raised you might want to take a look here.

MISSquoted** said...

Wokay. I just feel that this post deserved a comment. Significant or not.
:)

km said...

I used to grossly underestimate the "shyness" factor among some people who lurk on message boards and online forums.

(This is not such a problem among bloggers, IMO. Or maybe I am wrong again.)

So yeah, nice of you to welcome them.

Mo said...

thankies for the welcome.

not that it matters -- I hardly write these days.

??! said...

All:
Yay!

Red P:
Arre! Aise hi bol diya. Hum thodi koi celebrity hain ki comment nahin karenge.

NightW:
Wonderful. You know what was used for them?

Missquoted:
And thank you.

km:
Well, maybe it's just laziness. Enough of them around na?

mo:
You're still around! And yes, you're not writing. But that's ok if you don't want to. Should not write under pressure.

Phantasmagoria said...

And I prefer to fly solo. Or maybe I am just shy. Ahem.

??! said...

ph:
Oh cripes, I totally left you out of the circles didn't I? How very rude of me. Edited now. Maafi?

And shy? Really?

Anonymous said...

Wow, this so totally reflects my attitude, it was eerily like seeing my own thoughts in print... but not written by me :)

Dunno if it's just me, but I also sometimes faintly resent having to include new bloggers who dont seem quite as au courant (with things in general) as "our bunch" :)

Aishwarya said...

This is excellent. :D

Though as I grow older (heh) I actually find myself more willing to take an interest in other people's blogs, even if they're unlikely to become part of my little circles.

??! said...

shyam:
That itself (finding others writing what you've been thinking about) is a recurrent theme on some of these blogs. And perhaps is indicative of the level of closeness of thought that people in the same blog-circles occupy.

aishwarya:
thankee. That is interesting. Although, perhaps, not so surprising. After all,you can get to know people too well. Hence the need for expanding horizons?

Mo said...

Thanks again.

Drop me a mail, wouldja? -- chiaroscurus_at_gmail

Phantasmagoria said...

The intention was not to get included. And yes. :)

??! said...

ph:
But we want to include.

Also, how can you be shy if you associate with Revati and Flaffy?

Phantasmagoria said...

I do? ;) Contradictions possible no?

??! said...

ph:
Don't you? I thought blogger-meets and all happened? Or did they not.

And contradictions are fun.

Phantasmagoria said...

Ayyo. Yes and yes. But not necessarily... And maybe. We shall let you make sense of that. :P

??! said...

That did make some sense.

Also, I've got more comments out of you on one post than I've seen you do in the last month elsewhere. Heh.

Now don't you go running away. See how much fun can happen? Or are also just lazy like Revati?

Phantasmagoria said...

Which only means that you owe me something. :)

And yeah no comments for a while.

This time its not laziness.

??! said...

What? Now why? Dem - I shouldn't have mentioned it only. Comment na.

Also, yes, the ode. I remember. Please being patient about this.

Phantasmagoria said...

You ask too many questions. :)

And yes the ode. We remember. But we shall wait. Odes take a while.

Espèra said...

So you just don't have anything to say.
And/Or, not much in common.
And/Or, nothing interesting/worthwhile.

Happens.

??! said...

Ph:
It is a congenital problem, this asking of questions. Cannot be helped.

Espera:
Okaaaaay. Do explain, luv.

Espèra said...

"And if you don't find comments on your own blog, it may just be that we don't find much in common, or may not have anything to say."

That.
=]